Archives For winning


Saturday mornings at the Garcia house always involve two things, coffee and TV, oh and checking emails, oh and dogs.  As I sit here doing a little work and sipping on a hot cup of Dunkin Donuts coffee, the movie Kicking and Screaming is on, featuring Will Ferrell, the funniest man in the world.  Haha, all Will has to do is stand there and he cracks me up.

The movie is about a kids soccer team, coached by Will Ferrell, who is the worst coach ever and who’s only concern is winning games.  For him it’s not about the kids but is only about destroying the other team.  As the movie progresses, Will’s obsession gets out of hand and the kids and their parents have to witness him literally become a crazy man on a mission to win the championship.

During the last game of the movie he comes to his senses, as he realizes how much damage he’s done, especially to the relationship with his son.  He makes amends and as he addresses the team before their last game he says these words, “It’s not about winning . . . it’s about having fun”.  We’ve heard this line so many times and it usually has to do with sports and team work, but when I heard it this morning I immediately thought about how much this applies to relationships.

Over the past couple of weeks or more, for some reason, I’ve found myself providing counsel to friends in relationships and I’ve amazed myself at what comes out of my mouth.  Recent life circumstances and situations have given me a new appreciation for life & love and I have a sincere desire to see couples succeed and be happy with one another.  I want to see them thrive and build each other up, and even with couples who have been together for a while, I want to see them be strong for one another, continue to grow, and not lose site of who they have by their side.  If there is a lot of love there, then my desire is to always see love win, because a strong deep love is what will always get you through some of the toughest times with one another.  If you give up on that love, then you give up on each other, and well, we know what happens from there.

When i heard the phrase this morning “it’s not about winning, it’s about having fun” I thought about how serious couples can make a relationship and forget about having fun with one another.  I know that sometimes life can take over and consume us, but don’t ever stop having fun with your partner, wife, or husband.  Life is too short to be so serious all of the time and if you can’t have fun with your mate then something is wrong.  Your mate should be your best friend and the person that you enjoy being with more than anyone.  Don’t allow work or even the kids to get in the way of ensuring that your relationship is fun, spontaneous, and alive.  You two will be useless to your kids if their parents are in a cold dead situation.

It’s the weekend, and a long one, get outside.  Go ride bikes.  Find some live music playing somewhere and call the baby sitter.  Go play.  Do something you haven’t done yet and enjoy each other.  Let the weekend include lots of hugs and kisses, and yes, maybe even some Netflix.  Haha.  We all know what happens when Netflix is on.

Have a good weekend everyone.  Let love win, and have fun.


Jason Russell 2012

March 22, 2012 — Leave a comment

If you’re not living under a rock and have some form of connection to the internet, then you’re no stranger to the Kony 2012 viral video that reached over 70 million viewers within 48 hours of its release.  Hell, you don’t even need an internet source to know about this since the media jumped on this quick, as well as many radio talk shows and news outlets.

As well as receiving tons of praise and accolades, this campaign has also received much criticism, and it didn’t help the cause any when the creator, Jason Russell, was recently video taped walking around naked and acting super bizaar on a street corner near his California home.  The video shows Russell, butt naked, pacing back and forth, talking to himself, rambling, clapping his hands, and doing aerobics.   Jason was obviously exhibiting characteristics of someone “under the influence” and almost looked like a sleep walker.  Any normal person watching the video would have to agree that this was not normal behavior and I’m sure Russell himself, after watching himself in the video, is saying “who the hell was that?!”

There aren’t a lot of answers right now, especially since the family is choosing to deal with this privately.  You can’t blame them though.  This is embarrassing and it’s no one else’s business.  But i want to touch on a side of this story that you aren’t hearing much, and that is “mental illness”.  We have no idea what Jason’s mental state has been for the past several years or is now.  For all we know he could have had a mental condition that was never going to surface unless he was put under the stress and demand that he received upon the launch of this Kony video.  People have nervous breakdowns everyday as well as panic attacks, bipolar episodes which include manic highs and lows, anxiety attacks, and more.

If you’ve ever witnessed someone having a seizure, it’s an obvious sign of distress and is clearly a mental issue that needs immediate attention.  No one sits there and watches a seizure victim and points at them and laughs.  Your friends would slap you, I hope.  Twice.  Most people don’t understand mental illness and because it doesn’t have a very clear “face”, society takes it lightly and it doesn’t get the attention that it deserves.  It also comes with a social stigma that causes people with any type of mental illness to keep it under wraps.  I’ve witnessed first hand what the brain can do and how it’s “malfunction” can cause behavior that catches you off guard and is hard to understand.  I’ve been there when for no apparent reason a friend goes from being happy, laughing, having drinks to throwing their phone out the car window on the freeway and attempting suicide, only to snap later and ask “did i just take all of those pills?!  why?”.

We all remember Charlie Sheen and his antics, which lasted quite a while, way longer than it should have.  This was clearly a man with a mental condition that wasn’t being treated, wasn’t taking the proper medication, and was left untreated for all the world to see.  The diagnosis was bipolar and all of the signs were there to support it.  What did we all do?  Yes, we laughed.  And yes, a lot of what he did was hilarious and off the wall, but that’s what a breakdown will do, it’ll make a person do “crazy” things.  No one is winning when it comes to mental illness.

With all this said, I ask you all to step back and give Jason Russell a break.  Take into consideration that this young man was not himself and i think it would be safe to say that this was not the result of some type of bad trip on drugs.  Shame on all of you who are posting videos ridiculing him or calling him names.  I hope that you never have a break down and that your mind is always healthy.  We don’t poke fun at an elderly person with Alzheimer’s who is wandering the streets, lost, having no idea where the hell they are.  Let’s give this same amount of respect and consideration to someone who was caught off guard by a similar fate.

Jason will recover and should be fine.  He will have to live with this for the rest of his life.  If you pray, then pray for him and his family.  If you don’t, then maybe write to him and show him your support and wish him well.  And if you’re a perfect human being who never makes mistakes or falls, call me, I’d like to know your secret.

Wish you and your family well Jason.

-Hector Garcia