The first time I saw the trailer for the movie The Vow, my first thought was that this would be another Notebook movie attempt.  Of course many think the same thing once they see Rachel McAdams, the lead actress from the infamous Notebook movie.  And even though I took a few jabs at the movie I of course planned on seeing it, mainly because I’m a sucker for a good chic flick.  haha.

Yeah, you heard me.  I have no shame in admitting that I love a good love story / movie and won’t even hide the fact that these stinkin movies have the power to pull a few tears from me.  I know i look all big and tough and buffed, but deep down inside is a very tender heart with lots of love to give. 

So this was the case with The Vow, which my beautiful girlfriend suggested we see last night.  She felt it was slow while I was sitting there relating to Channing Tatum’s character and loved the passion and love that he felt for his wife.  Yes, I know that it was a movie but I really do believe that two people can love this way.  It doesn’t have to be a fairy tail or a big screen love story.  It’s available for everyone and it’s real.

“Life’s all about moments of impact and how they changed our lives forever”.  This is the main theme throughout the movie and Leo’s (Channing’s character) anthem.  This statement probably sums up all of our lives.  I know it does mine and I’m in the middle of an impact right now.  Actually several impacts, all that have led me to be with the beautiful and loving person that I’m sharing my life with.

In the movie, Leo finds himself fighting for his wife’s love, who lost the last 5 years of her memory in a car accident.  Because these two were so in love and so perfect for each other, you can only imagine how painful something like that could be for a guy like Leo, a man who obviously loves with all of his heart.  He’s very patient and he works hard and fights with everything that he has, only to find himself questioning whether he should give up.

I don’t know what i would do if I found myself in this situation.  I would have to fight like Leo.  I couldn’t give up.  I know how i am, and when i love I love with everything that i have.  I don’t know how to love half-ass.  I’ve seen that in myself these past couple of years with the person I’m with now.  We’ve been through a lot together and there were many times where I could have thrown in the towel, but because I believed in our love and continue to, I stand strong and I love her with all my heart.

You see, my girlfriend has suffered from bipolar the last few years.  Bipolar exposed itself during a few moments of impact that she experienced herself several years ago and since then it’s been a daily battle for her.  Through our time together I’ve had to experience her “go away” many times and each time that happens it’s like Paige losing her memory in a car accident.  She always comes back and because I always knew the deep love that was in there, I always waited.  These episodes were extreme a while back, but happen less and less now, and I want to believe that love is what is conquering.  Love and faith is what has kept us going and I’m confident that it’ll only make us stronger.

We found ourselves sitting in the theater last night after the movie was over with tears in our eyes.  All we could do is hold each other, finding words unnecessary.  We’re thankful for one another and she always thanks me for not giving up on her. I never will.

Don’t wait for a day like Valentine’s day to remind you to love.  Love everyday like it’s your last and love with everything you’ve got.  Many people find themselves in a rut or in a relationship / marriage that has been tested and the challenges of life put distance between them.  Close that gap by choosing to love with all of your heart.  Men, I challenge you to love your woman like no other.  Serve her.  Cherish her.  Honor her.  Fight for her.  Make a vow to never get too comfortable and to love the woman in your life as if it’s your last day on earth.

Tomorrow I will share more of our story.  Till then, Happy Valentines Day and take it easy on the chocolate.

- Hector Garcia

Facebook has been crazy today with all the posts by people upset with the recent news regarding the Komen Foundations withdrawal of support for Planned Parenthood.  Reportedly they pulled funding because of pressure from the pro-life side as well as stating that they have new guidelines to abide by in regards to who they support.  Whatever the case, everyone is talking about this and I could see this breaking the Komen foundation at some point.  Maybe.

I’m no expert, but I’m certain that the reasons for this move by Komen that we’re hearing reported by news outlets all over the world are not the whole story.  More will come out soon and yes, there’s always a bigger story waiting to be told.

From the minute I heard this air, several thoughts came to mind, which I share below.  Included with these will be a little advice to anyone jumping on the band wagon and hating on Komen.

KOMEN CAN DO WHAT THEY WANT WITH THEIR MONEY

The Komen Foundation has been a strong leader in the fight against breast cancer and has helped hundreds of thousands of women around the world in their effort.  They have had a long standing relationship with Planned Parenthood and until today, I bet many people didn’t even know that they were a big donor to Planned Parenthood.  I didn’t.

In the end, Komen has the right to pick and choose who they want to support.  It’s their money and their cause and even if some may not like the reason for this decision, it is what it is, and it’s their choice.  If you were a regular giver to the foundation and you gave because you knew they were helping Planned Parenthood, then yes, you have reason to be upset.  But if you never gave a cent to either the foundation or Planned Parenthood, what should it matter to you.  Planned Parenthood is well funded and they will find a replacement donor.  Someone will step up and fill this gap for them.

So rather than complain and hate on Komen, just write a check to Planned Parenthood.  If not, then just go back to updating your facebook status and twitter accounts with pictures of puppies and youtube videos of drunk mexicans dancing at Quinceaneras.

PLANNED PARENTHOOD, THE ABORTION KINGS

If you hear the name “Planned Parenthood” the first thing that comes to mind is abortions.  While I’m not an advocate of murdering unborn babies, it’s sad that this is all that they are known for.  Yes, they offer a lot of great services for women but unless you actually take advantage of those services, you would only know them as the “abortion clinic”.

A story like this brings lots of attention to Planned Parenthood and almost makes them out to be the “good guys” while Komen is the evil right wing christian strong arm.  While PP still offers great services to women, a large number of people around the world can’t support them because of the abortion factor, including myself.  They will always be known as the “abortion clinic” and it’ll always overshadow anything “good” that they offer to women.

KEEP ON GIVING

I don’t know anyone personally that donates to Komen or PP on a regular basis.  I know a few that run the marathons or participate in charity events, but that’s about it.  Because of this it’s hilarious to read posts from people bashing Komen and giving praise and showing support to little ole helpless Planned Parenthood. People who i know never give to either one of these organizations don’t realize how foolish they sound when they say they’re never going to give to Komen or they’re going to “take their money elsewhere”.  Cracks me up.

If you give to any organization because you believe in what they do and what they stand for, keep giving.  Don’t let something like this discourage you or lose hope in the “good work” that you’ve chosen to give to.  Not every organization is perfect and for the most part even charities and non-profits have to operate like businesses.  Just do what you can and give what you can to causes that you believe in.

I don’t give to Komen and I’ve already explained why I can’t support PP.  However, I give to causes when i can and i give in different ways and it’s not always in the form of money.  So keep doing what you’re doing and if you’re not doing anything, get off your butt and make a difference.

I leave you with the words to a new song I found today:  “tonight, we are young . . . so let’s set the world on fire, we can burn brighter than the sun”.  Go burn bright my friends.  Set something on fire, as long as it’s not your hair or your friend’s car.

- Hector