BEYONCE’S LEMONADE IS ROOFIED
A few years ago I was on vacation in Miami with my then girlfriend and on our way to the beach to hang out we stopped at a little store to grab some snacks. I believe we picked up a foam cooler, some ice, and filled that thing up like we were about to have a huge beach party. We get to the beach and post up and I open up one of the tastiest bottles of Hubert’s Lemonade that I’ve ever had and I couldn’t get enough. I don’t know if it was how cold the bottle was or if the lemonade had crack in it but I wanted more and after leaving the beach I think I picked up another bottle for the room. That little bottle of lemonade left a lasting impression on me but no other has been the same since. I must have just been really really thirsty.
The lemonade that I’m not thirsty for though is the bottle that Beyonce delivered to the world this week, and though many are praising her for her musical “genius” and “boldness”, I hear a different message from her and it’s not a very good one for women. All of her fans are drinking up her “tasty” lemonade and demanding that she pour it all over their bodies like kids playing near a fire hydrant in the hot streets of New York in the 60s, yet no one sees that her little mix of lemon, water, and sugar has been roofied.
I hear the word “empowerment” being used to describe what she has done through this biopic piece, but because there’s a lot of content that I feel degrades women weaved throughout this piece of work, I feel that it doesn’t help or empower but takes women’s “causes” several steps back. Do lyrics such as: “Who the f*** do you think I is? / You ain’t married to no average b***h boy / You can watch my fat ass twist boy / As I bounce to the next d*ck boy” really work to empower anyone?
Yes, I understand that Beyonce is an artist and she has the right to reveal any part of her life that she wants to and it’s apparent that her husband Jay Z gave approval, IF he’s even the “man” that Lemonade is referencing throughout. I also catch that there seems to be a “happy ending”, with footage of the couple hanging out, celebrating a birthday, etc. I get that the message is to make “lemonade” after life gives someone “lemons” but it’s the ice cubes in this “drink” that I have my opinions about. While the visuals and packaging look great, please be mindful of all the “Oh he so horny, yeah he want to f*** / He popped all my buttons and he ripped my blouse / He Monica Luwinski’d all on my gown” before describing this as empowering and amazing.
There is so much speculation surrounding Lemonade, with Jay Z’s indiscretions taking center stage but also leaving many to question whether the song is even about him and his wife. We’ll soon find out, but if this piece does anything it definitely brings up the topic of cheating and being unfaithful to one’s partner. I’ve been on both sides of this issue and everything on this topic is spoken from experience, many that I wish I didn’t have to go through.
If you’re in a relationship then you know that not everyday is magical and you’re going to have your ups and downs. You’re also going to go through some really dark times with one another and each of you is going to mess up really bad, and one of those mistakes might involve an emotional or physical affair. We don’t know the whole story with Jay Z and Beyonce and we’re left with having to interpret her music, but if Jay Z really did cheat on her, devoting an entire album to this can seem extreme, with many calling it brave. Whatever the purpose, making lots of money being one fo them, I just don’t swallow a lot of the content that’s weaved in and out of this album, but I do hope they make it and live a long life together.
DON’T SHARE YOUR LEMONADE WITH STRANGERS
A long life with someone doesn’t come easy or without lots of sacrificing and forgiveness, because both of you will make mistakes and need the other person to “give you another chance”. This will come more than once and it’s important that as you go through life and go through struggles that you work to protect one another and keep your struggles private as much as possible, only allowing close friends and family in to help. Don’t be messy and don’t go busting your man’s car windows out ladies. haha. Men, don’t be stalkers and assholes.
Life is going to give you lemons, lots and lots of lemons, huge freakin lemons, and if you choose to make lemonade out of them, be sure to share that pitcher with ONLY your partner and keep your business private. We don’t need to see angry Facebook or other social media posts of you two blasting one another. Work your stuff out at home and don’t get the world involved. Be classy and both of you work hard to be the bigger person as you go through your struggles and dark times. Social media has created a monster and everyone feels that it’s ok to share just about anything and everything they want when going through a crisis with a partner, but NO, that shouldn’t be the case.
I see it everyday in my Facebook feed and it’s sad, and unfortunately it comes out more from females than males (according to what I see on my feed). I’m sure we can all agree that females are more emotional that us men, but please, let’s both “bridal our tongues” and take time to chew on what we “think” we need to share with the world. Women, we don’t need to know that your man messed up and is in the dog house or read posts from you that are clear references to your partner or ex. Even if you don’t use names, your close friends and family will know who you’re talking about and it’s not fair to either one of you. It can also make you look really shallow and stupid, so be careful with that.
And men, we don’t need to read about how you need advice from all of your Facebook friends because you found out that your girl has been talking to someone else in secret. Work that out at home and reach out to close friends behind the scenes, but don’t use public forums to put the other person’s “business” out there. If you’re in a serious relationship or married, you two should be “protecting” one another anyway, and blasting the other person in public is the opposite of protecting, it’s destructive and leaves no room for forgiveness.
LADIES, KOOLAIDE IS BETTER THAN BEYONCE’S LEMONADE
Ladies, if your man has ever made huge mistakes and hurt you, I’m sorry. We’re not the smartest creatures sometimes and I know that we can be little kids in big adult bodies, but we mean well, at least some of us do. We’re not immune to making mistakes any more than you are, and I encourage you to drink a different kind of lemonade than the one that someone like Beyonce and the current culture is offering. Drink from a cup that is full of love and forgiveness, one that allows you to always be the “bigger person” and one that doesn’t go after revenge but rather goes after understanding and grace. No one says that we have to stay with someone that hurts or betrays us, but I encourage men and women alike to be classy, be strong, and be bold, but by all means don’t feel that in order to be either of those that you have to lose your dignity and “go for the throat”. Show your partner the same grace and love that you yourself would want if you “F#$!” up.
More love. More Hugs. More forgiveness. Less roofied lemonade.