nothingtowrite_blog

WHEN YOU HAVE NOTHING TO SAY, SAY NOTHING

I love writing, as it’s one of the most therapeutic things I can do, and aside from my 14 year old chihuahua named Squirt, writing has helped me get through some really tough times over the past few years.  Just a year ago after a very bad break up, I found myself writing everyday for almost a month, many times doing so at like 3 or 4am, knowing that if I didn’t write out what was in my head I would never be able to sleep.  This stint of unloading my thoughts into my 13″ Macbook Pro eventually turned into a small book, one that no one will ever get to read.

My last blog post dates back to March 2016 which was titled “Make More Mistakes” and it was around that time that I felt that I had nothing else to write.  It was almost like the end of a very long several months of therapy, with my last blog post being the last visit to the doctor’s office.  If you read back through my posts before that you’ll see that the overall theme was the result of being hurt from the breakup and working through the after math and a broken heart.  This blog exists as a place for me to share my thoughts, my life, and lessons learned in hopes that it will help someone else, so if you come through here regularly then I hope it has done just that.

There have been many times since March where I say to myself “Hmm, I need to blog about something, it’s been so long” only to find myself sitting in front of my computer with nothing to write.  I won’t write and make up some bull shit just for the sake of blogging, but today I felt the urge to write about nothing.  Haha.

I have a lot of “blogger” friends that work to keep their blogs fresh and updated with new content, hoping to increase their following and website traffic, etc.  There are entire blogging communities that work to help each other do the same, but that doesn’t really interest me.  This is an outlet for me and I’ll write when I feel like I actually have something to say and today the only thing that I have to say is “Hello” and share that I haven’t really had anything to write lately.  LOL.

If you have a blog or some type of online presence, write what you feel and every time you write, be sure to feel what you write.  Let everything that you write have purpose and don’t be afraid to admit the times that you simply have nothing to say.  You’ll find your writing to be much more powerful and enjoyable when it comes from your heart.

I’ve learned a lot about myself this past year and I have tons to write about, I just haven’t felt the need to share it.  I think that over the next few weeks I’ll take time to share the many lessons that I’ve learned and provide some insight and tools that have been life savers for me.  I have an entire series that I could devote to therapy and how valuable and life changing it can be.  Maybe I’ll start with that in a few days.  Maybe.

Till then, have an awesome day, or week.

@hectorgarciahtx

mistakes_blog

MAKE MORE MISTAKES

“The wisest man/woman in the room is the one who’s made the most mistakes. We all make mistakes, no one is perfect, but if you don’t learn from those mistakes, then that’s all they are . . Mistakes.”

I can’t take full credit for the quote above, as its a mixture of something I heard somewhere else with the addition of my own thoughts in the second sentence, but the truth in this little statement is so huge and powerful.  Life is full of successes, but filled with even more mistakes.  In fact, I think that it can be said with much certainty that very rarely will you have success without making a few mistakes.

So what is a mistake?  Can we define it as an accident?  A failure?  Using poor judgment or making “bad” decisions?  I think it’s all of those things and more.  Our mistakes can probably be classified as anything and everything in our life that has brought about hurt, pain, suffering, disappointment, heart ache, frustration, and even sadness.  Many of you can relate, you’re either going through a “mistake” right now or struggling to ensure that you don’t make one.  It’s part of daily life and yes, making mistakes sucks.

I remember going through a divorce about 6 years ago and feeling like such a failure.  I had been married 12 years and with that person for over 18 yrs.  That’s half of my life!  Regardless of the reasons for the divorce, I did love that person whole heartedly and I fought for the marriage as long as I could so I have no regrets.  It’s not something that either of us ever wanted, but it happened, and was definitely a failure and disappointment, not to mention a very sad part of both of our lives.  But with that said, I can sit here and type this all out and say that I am much wiser after going through that, and as a “mistake” in my life it provided experiences that I felt I learned from and I worked to apply what I learned in the next relationship.  Unfortunately the next relationship had it’s own share of struggles and after having that person abandon the relationship, I found myself alone for the first time in my adult life with lots of time to reflect on mistakes, lessons learned, and all the time in the world to work on myself.

EMBRACE YOUR MISTAKES

Does a “mistake” like a failed marriage or relationship make me want to be on guard with my heart or love less?  I’m definitely guarded, but my failures make me want to love even more and cause me to want to give the next person more love than others in the past.  I have a lot of love to give away regardless and when i love I love with all of my heart.

The same goes for other areas in my life such as business.  I can’t tell you how many mistakes I’ve made over the years doing business or at least trying to.  I’ve lost so much money in the past on ventures that I later felt were a waste of time and energy, but I learned from them.  Some lessons learned took longer than others, but I’m wiser from them none the less.  I remember hosting BMX Flatland events from 1999 – 2006 in an effort to push an apparel brand as well as help promote the sport.  I did it out of love for BMX but I wasn’t a smart business man and I lost money every year.  Flatland is a small part of BMX and there isn’t enough involvement to help sustain these types of events, so 2006 was the last event for the Elevation Flatland series.  I get asked all the time to host another series or flatland event but with the help of my good friend Cisco, I’ve taken what I learned from that time and turned it into one of the largest outdoor bicycle festivals in Houston called the HTX Bike Fest which celebrates it’s 5th year this September 2016.

ALLOW YOURSELF AND OTHERS TO MAKE MISTAKES

Making mistakes is a fact of life.  If you’re in a relationship, you and your partner both are going to mess up and it’s important to give each other room to do so.  Some “mess ups” will be “bigger” than others but the both of you need to give one another room to mess up, over and over again.  I don’t know where this ability to forgive comes from but in my past two relationships, one being my marriage, I was put in positions to have to forgive many many times.  I could have given up and walked away but I loved the people I was with and I wanted to give each forgiveness that I too would need at some point.  No couple is able to celebrate 10, 20, or even 50 years of marriage without having made 1,000’s of mistakes along the way.

So if you’ve had many failures, made many mistakes, and are even in the middle of the hurt or disappointment, know that you are a wiser person because of it all.  Learn from these mistakes and do something different because of your new wisdom.  Don’t ever give up on yourself or on others.  If we could all understand that every single one of us is an imperfect human being and that we’re going to make mistakes, there would be a lot more forgiveness in the world.

If you don’t allow your mistakes to produce change inside of your mind and heart, then all you will ever be able to say is that you made a mistake, and that in itself is a big mistake.

Make more mistakes, but not on purpose.

@hectorgarciahtx

strong_jesus

JESUS HAD A SIX PACK

(Edited from posted in April 2015)

Since I was a little boy and as far back as I can remember, I’ve always had a strong belief in God and something “bigger than me and this world”.  This was so much so that in High School I began to question everything I was being taught in the Catholic church, and set out on my own journey to “find God”.  That search for “truth” continues to this day, but one very practical thing that never really made sense was how the world has portrayed Jesus, which has been a very frail, skinny, white, pale sickly looking man who anyone could take down with one punch to the face.

I believe in a very different image of Jesus Christ, one that I feel should have been adopted a long long time ago, and it’s based on very practical observations.  I believe that Jesus was not frail or sickly, but rather a very strong and fit man with dark skin, strong forearms and biceps, resembling a very fit and toned MMA fighter of today.  He probably didnt’ have the physique of a bodybuilder, and may have been more lean, but by all means had more muscle and endurance than most of us.  How have I come to this conclusion?

JESUS WAS A FISHERMAN

The fisherman of today have it pretty easy compared to the days of Jesus.  There were no motorized boats or machinery that lifted nets and brought fish into your boat.  Lots of rowing by hand, pulling up nets by hand all day, every day.  Unloading the boat of fish, packaging the fish, pulling the boats in, etc.  A complete work out like this every single day would have to keep these guys fit and toned.  The exaggerated depiction of Popeye’s forearms was not just the creation of a cartoonist, as I’m sure that fisherman developed huge forearms from all of this work.  In addition to all of the manual labor that kept them fit, take into account their constant exposure to the sun which probably kept them nice a tanned all year round.

 JESUS WAS A CARPENTER

Carpentry today can’t compare to the work involved in the days of Jesus either.  Because of my circular saws, miter saws, jig saw, and my dewalt cordless drill, I can build in minutes what it probably took hours or days for them to build back in the day.  And the energy exerted would be minimal.

If Jesus needed to build a table for someone, he had to manually cut each piece of wood, shave each piece by hand, and perform tasks that required strength and arm pressure.  Wood work back then was not easy work and I’m sorry, but if you do your research on the many different facets of wood work back then one would have to come to the conclusion that these craftsman were building muscle while working.

JESUS ENDURED HIS EXECUTION BECAUSE HE WAS PHYSICALLY ABLE

Without going into detail about every task involved with being a fisherman or carpenter back in that day, I would hope that you can see how easy it would be to come to the conclusion that Jesus was not what the world has described to us for so long.  I feel that one of the major reasons that Jesus was able to endure what he did during his crucifixion was due to his physique and fitness.  The “frail” Jesus wouldn’t have made it past lashing #4 or #5, and yet Jesus withstood 40 FREAKIN LASHES with a weapon that was designed to rip his skin off!

Add to this the beat down that he received from the soldiers, the fact that he had to carry his own heavy cross to his own execution, and then having huge railroad type spikes driven through his arms and feet.  The strength needed to continuously try to pull him self up and position himself to breath easier required a strength that the little white sickly Jesus simply wouldn’t have been able to handle.  Many of us would have been dead before even making it to carrying our own cross.

JESUS WAS A BAD ASS

As you sip on your coffee this morning, prepare for lunch, or even as you make plans for this coming Easter Sunday, remember that the man behind the Easter holiday was plain and simply a Bad Ass.  Whether you believe that he rose from the dead or not, Jesus was a real man who walked this earth, and history supports the fact that he was executed in one of the most gruesome ways possible.

His message was just as real, which in a nut shell was one of LOVE and FORGIVENESS.  If you take anything away from the story of Jesus at least take that.  Learn from his selfless life of Love and walk in it everyday.  He gave us so many great lessons and tools to use to live this life and his story has stood the test of time and will continue for centuries to come.

Have a Great Easter everyone and eat lots of BBQ this Sunday.  *smiley face here.

@hectorgarciahtx

 Photo artwork from Tjokorda Bagus Wiratmaja

magic_blog

TURN YOUR MAGIC ON

It was chilly outside the night of the Super Bowl 2016 and me and a friend were standing outside sipping on a good drink waiting for the half-time show to start.  Cold Play was the featured music group and it was the first time I heard their new song “Adventure of a Lifetime”, (video below) which immediately caught my attention, mainly because it was a happy song and made me want to climb a tree or take off running.  I know there are Cold Play haters out there, but I don’t apologize for my love for their music and I feel it was this group that helped make the upright piano a staple instrument to have at center stage.

There’s a line in the new song that says “Turn your magic on” and it’s just one of many good motivational lines in the song.  There’s something very inspiring about someone telling you to “turn your magic on”, because whether you believe it or not, we’ve all got a little bit of magic in us.  Ever been in a situation where you needed to “perform” or do some convincing and someone close to you leaned over and said “Hey Steve, go do your magic”.  Steve is a fictional character, but yes, I’m sure many of you have had to do a little magic in your life, and I’m not talking about pulling a rabbit out of hat.

When’s the last time you had to “turn on your magic”?  When’s the last time you made some magic happen?  Well, it’s been too long and the world could use more magic.  For example, I know that one way I do magic comes in the way that I can make people feel.  For the most part I’m a positive person and I genuinely want to see people do great things in life, even though I myself may not be doing the same.  But it’s an honest desire and whether I’m having a great day or a moody one, I will go out of my way to make someone feel good about themselves by simply acknowledging them, shaking their hand with full attention, or by giving good hugs.  If someone walks away feeling motivated after meeting me then I’ve done my magic and hopefully they too will do the same.

3 WAYS TO TURN YOUR MAGIC ON

BE YOURSELF

Just be yourself.  Every one of us is unique and different.  One amazing trait about us human beings is that though there are billions of us walking around on this planet, there are no two identical finger prints.  We all have different prints and it’s what makes you you.  You can’t be duplicated and you are who you are for a reason.  It’s up to you to figure out who that is and what you’re great at.  Once you figure that out, turn “it on” and be awesome at it and change the world around you.  Anyone can paint, dance, build, speak, create something, but no one can do it like you.

BE GREAT

Everyone that I know who is great at something, whether it be a sport, craft, skill, or trade, is where they are because of dedication and practice.  No one becomes a master at what they love overnight and it takes time to get to the point where you can consider yourself a “pro” or “master”.  Even then those people have to continually practice to stay on top or on point.  The same goes for your magic.  Once you figure out what you’re good at, put it into practice and be great at it.  Whatever gifts you have are not there for you to keep to yourself.  The world needs you and your amazing magic.

BE AVAILABLE

Your magic is useless if you’re not ready to “perform” at any time.  Always be ready and even go as far as look for opportunities to “turn it on”.  With as much negativity as we have in the world today, we NEED more magic.  Make it happen and be awesome at it like the monkeys in this video.  They’re making magic happen and you’ll want to watch this magic over and over again.

Have a great St Patty’s Day.  Go find your pot of gold you little magic Leprechauns.

@hectorgarciahtx

 

 

 

Own_Shit

OWN YOUR SHIT

Im pretty sure the day was a Monday afternoon in the summer because dad had just called us in for lunch and his days off were Sunday and Mondays and we weren’t in our Sunday clothes.

As my brothers and I grabbed our plates and parked ourselves around the behemoth of a TV, ( you remember that crappy cheaply stained big box of a tv that looked like it took an acre of trees to make) we started our routine argument about what we were going to watch. Of course I wanted to watch cartoons and they wanted to watch MTV or something I had no clue about. I was only 7 and it was a long time ago but I can still feel that blue shaggy carpet and the summer breeze that would blow through the windows.

Growing up in our house there was an unwritten law that everyone abided by and that was that the AC was only allowed to be turned on from 4pm – 6am. So if you wanted to be inside the house during the heat of the day, you made sure every window in the house was open. As we continued arguing, we kept getting louder and louder about what to we should watch. By then My father was fed up and simply yelled from the kitchen , “lla!”. Translated to English , “Stop! Cut it out!.”We did and as always I was out voted. After that, My older brother changed the channel to what he wanted watch and we just sat there eating our lunch in silence.

As we continued eating,  my older brother began to sniff the air and then continued to sniff with determination, like a blood hound out to find his target. This then became his mission and he took another long sniff of the air to confirm the odor and yells, ” who farted? I’m eating! That’s nasty!” Everyone denies the accusation and the ping pong match begins. He then says, “Well why does it smell like shit!” The timing could not have been more perfect if it had been scripted, they all said in a unanimous voice, ” Steve did it !”, which surprised the hell out of me! I was completely lost! Had I farted and not realized it? By then my two brothers had jumped on my older brother’s wave and started saying it was because I hadn’t showered since the day before and that maybe I didn’t wipe right. Needless to say I defend myself the best way any 7 year old kid would, by simply saying, ” nuh-uh, nuh-uh!”

Of course by this time we were very loud and my dad decided to walk over to the living room and asked what the heck was going on. Once aging the destiny child group sang in harmony ,” Steve crapped on himself or really needs to go take a shower because it smells like poop and we can’t eat.” Like a scratched record I stayed in the bridge signing , ” nuh-uh, nuh-uh!”

As my brothers waited for my dad to get after me, my father simply asked, “Were you guys playing outside?” “Yes” we all said. He then looked at my older brother and simply said, “Look at the bottom of your shoe.” You see my brother was sitting Indian style with a huge turd on the bottom of his shoe which was facing the side I was sitting on. I can see how my older brother thought it was me, I can see how it was so easy to say that I was the source of the stank. The one who made a stink about the stank is the one who ruined his own appetite.

Although I was free and clear of all wrong doing , Id like to believe we all learned a valuable lesson that day. Like most valuable lessons they fly out the window when we need to apply them. Like myself, I’m almost certain you have reflected on some instances in your life when you could have saved yourself some pain, embarrassment  and sadness by simply checking the bottom of your shoe and admitting to your contribution to the situation.

There will be times in life when everything seems like it’s someone else’s fault, like all the signs point to someone else for your misfortune or “bad luck”.  Well I say to you today, before you start blaming someone else or society and whatever excuses we can come up with, let’s take a hard look at ourselves.  Let’s be honest with ourselves, about how we acted, what we did, how little effort we have put in and most importantly lets be honest about how no matter how awesome your are today, there is always room for improvement.

I say to you once again, let’s be honest with ourselves and dig deep, leave no rock unturned and no shoe unchecked so we can enjoy our lunch and enjoy this show we call life.

Steve Martinez:  Guest Blogger.  |  @iamstevemtz